Royce: The life, times, best jokes and funniest photos of America's favorite clean comedian

Royce: The life, times, best jokes and funniest photos of America's favorite clean comedian

Royce Elliot

Language: English

Pages: 124

ISBN: 2:00263660

Format: PDF / Kindle (mobi) / ePub


A joke book from comedian Royce Elliot

A Sample:

Doctor in the House (Doctor Series, Book 1)

Detective Made Easy

A Load of Hooey

Seriously Funny: The Rebel Comedians of the 1950s and 1960s















Royce! * * * The Life, Times, Best jokes and Funniest Photos of America's Favorite Clean Comedian Publishing and Editorial Consultant Jerry Klein For any use of the enclosed materials, permission must be obtained in writing from the author. I dedicate this book to my b autifu1 wife Helen ... and to all my children - Hedy, Brett, Brian and Tye. Also to my good friend, the late Conway Twitty. A speciaJ thanks to my son Brian, who actually collaborated with me on this book Laughlin, Nev.-

worked. Meanwhile, the bookings go on and get bigger and better. He has worked at a Mike Ditka roast in Vegas, he often does industrial shows, is a regular with the Chicago Cubs Fantasy Camp and has more appearances 6 .............-- scheduled in Vegas and elsewhere through the rest of the year. He also has appeared at national conventions for AT&T, McDonald's, Miller Beer and Molson and Labatt in Canada and at the Grand 01' Opry. First time he appeared in Vegas was October (1989). He was

football, basketball and baseball. 7 "I ran the hundred-yard dash but it didn't count. I ran under the tape." And boxing. "I meant to get up at the count of eight, but I must have dozed off." And so it goes. Elliott is making impressively big bucks and big hits in the fast world of casino entertainment and industrial shows. But back in Peoria, he says, "they have to have a committee to pay you a hundred bucks." Still, he does play in Peoria and is probably appreciated more in his own land than

moon. * * * He's so slow he could run all day in a phone booth. * * * He was so dumb in high school he flunked recess. 55 She should have her body donated to science fiction. * * * He went elephant hunting because someone told him to pick on somebody his own size. * * * He wouldn't have a 30-inch waist even if they measured him through the middle. * * * She bounces so many checks they had to retread her checkbook. * * * He's so rich he wrote a check and the bank bounced. 56 Ajewish

psychiatrist, "Doc, You gotta help me. ''The Doc said, "What do you do?" He said, "I'm a mechanic, and the Doc said, "Lay under the couch." 9Q IIIII A guy said, "Doc, I've got this complex. I keep thinking I'm a dog." The doctor said, "How long have you suffered with this delusion?" The guy said, "Ever since I was a pup." * * * DOCTORS * * * A guy said, "Doc, I've got this terrible memory problem" and the doctor said, "Pay me in advance." * * * The patient said, "Doc, my leg's killing me,

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