The Bigger Book Of Gross Jokes
Format: PDF / Kindle (mobi) / ePub
Julius Alvin has created an even bigger, even grosser, even more offensive collection that hits everyone's sore spots and cranks up the volume of laughs with hundreds of hilarious jokes from America's favorite gross-out king.192 pp.
two shrinks who'll tesUfy that you were insane. Just in case, I'll pay off all of the district attorney's witnesses. Also. lhe judge Is a good friend and he owes me one, big time. " "That's great," the prisoner says. "What do I need to do?" The lawyer says, "Just to be safe. try and escape." • • • How do you know when your lawyer is well hung? You can't get your fingers between hls neck and the noose. • •• What's the d[[erence between McDonald's and a black prostitute? McDonald's has only
the definition of a perfect marriage? Your housekeeper and your wife both com e a couple of times a week. • • • Why don't blondes eat bananas? They can't find the zippers. • • • What's the best way tn train your girlfriend to give oral sex:? Tte her hands behind her back and make h e r eat spaghetti . Now That's Sick! Why do jags love hamburgers? Because it's hot meat between two nJce buns. • • • A five-year-old child crawls onto Santa's lap at the local Wal-Mart. Santa asks the
"True," says the Jewish guy, "but the work was done last year." • • • What do women and dog shit have in common? The older they get. the easier they are to pick up . • The Bigger Book of Gross Jokes \Vhat's the d![ference between a proctologist and a bartender? The proctologist only has to look at one asshole at a time. • • • Hear about the stuck-up prostitute? She was too good to go fuck herself. • • • Why can't women be trusted? They bleed for four days and don't dJe . •• • • What
friends borrow your toothbrush. • • • The Bigger Book of Gross Jokes \Vhy don'tjat dykes wear yeLLow? So they \Von't be mistaken for taxicabs. • • • Why are men like microwaves? They get hot really fast. then go off in thirty seconds. • • • What's the definition of a dyke? A woman trying to do a man's work. • • • 1\vo dnmken Polacks come stumbling out of a bar and start pisslng ln a garden. A cop comes along and starts writing them each a ticket for public urination. The cop, wrttlng up
masturbate with only one hand? So they can moan \vith the other. • • • Moses comes back from Mount Sinai and says to the Je\VS, "I've got good news and bad news. The good news Is. I got the Twelve Commandments knocked do\vn to Ten Commandments. The bad news is, adultery is still in ... • • • \Vhen Mrs. Hepplewhite goes to see her gynecologist. he helps her onto the table. then asks, ··so what seems to be the problem?" Mrs. Hepplewhite says . .. Ever since you fitted me with that diaphragm,